“Everybody returns someday.”
In the previous post I was getting excited to watch a new series – True Detective, and now that show has come and gone. My blog took a back seat, because for once I started actually living in the present as opposed to trying to hold on to the past. It always takes something special to pull you out of a slump, and while I seem to constantly have one foot in mine, I’m trying hard to have both feet on even ground.
I’ve written, deleted, re-written, and deleted this post at least five times over the past few months, wondering when would be an appropriate time to start writing again. Thinking to myself, when I would need to start writing again. While posting on tumblr has kept blogging here at bay, at some point having a voice behind the pictures is becoming equally important to me. I’ve always said it’s up to you, the viewer, to decipher what the photograph means (perhaps out of laziness to bother explaining, a trait i’ve gained from art school). Now, however – having experienced how wrong taking the silent seat can go – I’d rather clear the air about a lot of misconceptions out there. To challenge the voices of ignorant writers who cower behind their anonymous comments.
Since originally sitting down to write this post, Ella has become a two time grammy winner. She has taken home a Brit too. Currently she is on the opposite side of the world on tour. As much as I miss her, I couldn’t be prouder of what she has achieved so far. If you are lucky enough to attend one of her shows on this current tour, you’ll experience more than just her voice. The production she has dreamt up looks incredible… I can’t wait to see it myself next month.
If someone asked me what this blog was about, I really wouldn’t know how to answer… It started off as something trying to battle the giant that is tumblr, to escape a world of what I would say is original content lost – a seemingly endless stream of half naked girls and cats and it all repeated again and again: I have learnt that if you’re not putting up your own photos, someone else will, and they WILL take credit for your work. This blog developed into a series of words and pictures, thoughts and often over-thoughts about trying to live in a country that wasn’t my own, about trying to be in a relationship with a girl who lives 6000 miles away, about whatever the fuck someone in their 20′s shouldn’t be doing, but currently is. My life is probably a lot different now, but it feels normal on the inside.
Jared Leto said that fame doesn’t change you, it changes everyone around you. While I’m not the centre of attention here (and fuck, the times I have, it’s never been fun), I do become aware of the people around me and their transparency. They fail to hide it. I’ve experienced being a target of the tabloids, finding moments I thought I was in safe hands splattered all over the internet, being pushed and shoved, or watching others get pushed and shoved by paparazzi just to get what they think they’re entitled to. While I’m dragging on about the negative aspects, they are only a small part of my world now. There is a bright, shining silver lining to this thing I’ve been exposed to. I’ve had the privilege to sit on an aircraft for 12 hours, cramped, exhausted but happy (like Louis CK once said, “YOU’RE FLYING. YOU’RE SITTING IN A CHAIR IN THE SKY!”). I’ve been able to tell tales of the many amazing people I’ve met along the way – from fellow photographers, to artists I’ve always admired and never thought I’d get to meet, let alone have a simple thing like coffee with… People who seem to scramble the words within your brain and the only thing you end up doing is blurting out ‘HILSKDFLKWELK’ (at some point it’s a verbal greeting, but ends up a flurry of sweat mixed with spit). More importantly, I’ve found a little inspiration from new faces. People I look up to. People whose work I admire so much. For all of this I have to thank the one I look up to the most. Who I admire the most. Who still fills the little voids I try to avoid.
Some stories I keep for the memory banks, and some I’ll share here. Currently I am mostly at home trying to carry on with real life (and I call it real life even though for the most part it is all still so surreal).
While the posts may still be few and far between, this is my someday.
This is my return to the blog.